Notes on Editing - Chapter 9
By David McHam
Chapter Nine
Usage
Making distinctions between words is one of the most important aspects of the writing and editing process. Writers and editors must know a great deal about language, its logic and appropriateness. They must learn to develop a critical eye, to look askance at words. Developing this critical nature is essential to becoming an accomplished writer.
Strive for freshness in the language. Stay away from clichés, bromides and trite expressions. The distinction between the good and the bad, the acceptable and unacceptable is not easy. Nevertheless, if the word or expression has been used so much that it has become distracting it should be avoided. A writer becomes a better writer by staying away from trite expressions and searching for the new and the fresh.
Be aware of clichés and avoid them like the plague (just kidding, of course). Clichés occur because of the tendency of all of us to rely upon familiar and easy constructions in our speaking and writing. One instance of a cliché here and there wouldn't make a great difference. When they recur, however, they become noticeable and distracting.
Too much news writing relies on clichés: hailed, violence flared, flatly denied, in the wake of, no immediate comment, gutted by fire, strife-torn, probe, police nabbed.
Other words may not appear to be clichés, but they are. Examples: following, prior, prior to, due to.
Use after instead of following, use previous instead of prior, use before instead of prior to, use because of instead of due to. These other words -- after, previous, before, because of -- blend in better in construction and do not attract attention.
Don't use -wise endings. Be cautious about -ize in words. Don’t use prioritize. Shun the expressions early on and at that point in time.
When writing about future events, stay away from words like scheduled, slated and set. Avoid hold, as in to hold a meeting or in a meeting will be held. Use future tense. Say that such and such a group will meet at such and such a time to do whatever it is going to do.
Another example is under and over. Use less than and more than when quantity is involved. Use fewer for numbers.
Some writers use just, very, so, get, done, only, some, really, in fact and similar words unnecessarily in their writing. Just and only are words of evaluation. While is one of the most subtle crutch words. While should be used to refer to the exact same time. As an editor, you should watch for these crutch words and take them out. The ultimate crutch word is thing.
Writers often resort to trite expressions. It all started is the best example. Another example is the That's what so and so said construction used after a direct quotation. Other such expressions are When asked and How does so and so feel about.
Sometimes writers believe they are the first to stumble upon expressions. An example would be, So and so never thought when she was growing up on the plains of Nebraska that one day she would .... Or, So and so doesn't look like an explosives specialist.
Redundancies
Another level of misuse is tautology -- the needless repetition of an idea, statement or word. This is a form of redundancy or pleonasm. Examples include:
advance reservations, advance forward, future plans, future prospects, present incumbent, past history, past experience, past records, past custom, usual custom, dates back to, old antiques, new innovation, new record, new construction, personal experience, personal friendship, personal friend, free passes, free gifts, actual fact, true fact, invited guests, another one, inside of, outside of, few in number, consensus of opinion, a distance of 10 yards, for a period of, in the year such and such, big or small in size, red (or any other) colored, rainy weather, sunny weather, at the corner of one street and another, set of twins, widow of the late, dead body, strangled to death
A fine example: the reason is because. Also, reason why is redundant.
Other expressions may not be repetitious, but may simply be trite, tired and worn from use. Examples:
last but not least, few and far between, slow but sure, goes without saying, sadder but wiser, words cannot express, easier said than done, first and foremost, ripe old age, bitter end
Bad Words
Some words have negative connotations and should be avoided. Among them: connive, loot and cohorts. All involve criminal activity. Don't use them. Especially be careful with drunk for the same reason.
Be sure you know the difference in cirrhosis and sclerosis.
Avoid words that may have double meanings. Climax and affair are two of them.
Words Relating to Death and Injury
Suffering is suffering and shouldn't be used in expressions such as suffering wounds or suffering damages. Also, don't say that someone suffered a heart attack. Sustained means to bear up under. Therefore, sustaining a fatal injury is gibberish. An all-time bad example from a headline: Wreck hurts two Navarro students.
Injured people are always rushed to the hospital.
Strangled means to die. Choked doesn't involve dying.
Say so and so died, apparently of a heart attack. Don't say apparently died and don't say of an apparent heart attack.
After a death, say funeral arrangements are pending, not funeral services are pending.
Amounts, Figures and Numbers
Use more than instead of over for amounts and distances.
Use less than instead of under for amounts and distances.
Use few or fewer with numbers and less with amounts. Few were present. In less time.
Stay away from approximately. Approximate is a good verb.
Don't use some or a total of or around. Use about with a round number. Be sure the number is a round number: 20, 30, 40. Some round numbers are obviously round: 50, 100, l,000, 5,000, 10,000. You don't need to use an about with those numbers.
Almost is better than nearly in most situations. Either could be used in reference to distance. Almost is more acceptable in reference to time, nearly in reference to position.
Another implies there was a first. Another 25 were sent means that at least 25 were sent previously. Maybe even 50 or 75.
Be careful of only. It can be unnecessarily evaluative, as in: Only 100 people showed up for the meeting.
Words That May be Confused
Be careful with principle and principal, stationary and stationery, compliment and complement. Spell supersede, consensus, commitment, memento and relevant correctly.
Consensus can stand alone. Consensus of opinion and general consensus are redundant. General consensus of opinion is very redundant.
Ordinance is municipal law, ordnance is military supplies.
Different from, not different than.
Try to, not try and.
Center on, not center around or about; revolves around. Use concerns instead of centers on.
Disinterested means impartial. Not interested and uninterested are the words you may have thought disinterested was.
Verbal means in words; oral means spoken. An agreement is oral and is in words unless it is a written agreement. Say they agreed and shook hands.
Eager means looking forward to; anxious means looking to with anxiety.
A dilemma is a choice between two equally unacceptable alternatives.
It's martial law, but Marshal Dillon and junior marshals. Both Marshal and Marshall are proper nouns, but Marshall is more common: Thom Marshall, Thurgood Marshall, the Marshall Islands, Marshall, Texas.
A dais is a raised platform. Podium is a small platform, such as the one a conductor stands on. A lectern is a reading stand. A rostrum is a platform for speaking. A speaker stands in a pulpit, on a podium or rostrum, and at or behind a lectern.
Lend is a verb, loan is a noun.
Postponed means to put off. Canceled means to do away with. Use delay for a short postponement.
Rebut means to argue; refute means to succeed in rebutting.
Making Distinctions Between Words
Prophecy is a noun, prophesy a verb.
A council is a group of persons, such as a city council. Counsel is advice or an attorney as a noun, or to advise as a verb.
The place of the cross is Calvary. Cavalry has to do with horses and armed vehicles.
Censor is related to censorship. Censure is a judgment, a reprimand. Sensor is another word entirely.
It's complexion, not complected. Say dark-complexioned.
The speaker implies, the listener infers. An implication is not direct.
Allude is indirect, a suggestion or implication. Refer is specific, to the point.
Comprise is best used in the sense that the whole comprises the parts. Used composed of instead of comprised of. Example: The United States comprises 50 states.
Annoy means to bother. Irritate means to displease. Aggravate means to make worse.
Prone means to lie face downward. Supine means lying face up.
Immigrate is to enter. Emigrate is to leave. An émigré is a person forced to leave his or her country for political reasons.
Imminent is impending. Eminent is prominent. Immanent is confined to consciousness. Eminence is someone who holds a position of distinction or something of distinction. Eminent domain is the right of the state to take private property for public use with adequate compensation.
Something incredible is difficult to believe. A person is incredulous if he is inclined to disbelieve what he sees or hears. Also, if a person causes disbelief he is incredible.
Liable means responsible; libel is defamation. Do not use liable as for likely.
The word is hearsay.
Fine Distinctions
A pupil attends elementary school.
A lawyer practices law. An attorney is a lawyer with a client.
A building is located where it is built. After that, it is situated or just there. Locate also means to find after a search.
A group small enough so that the members may be identified individually consists of persons. Otherwise, the term is people. Thousands of people. Four persons came to see us.
An audience hears. Spectators watch.
A grown-up female person is a woman.
A house is where you live. A home is what you make of living there. Your house can burn down, but your home can't.
Sky is preferred to skies.
It's evidently, not evidentally. Evidently and apparently are very close. Simplest way to deal with them is this: Use apparently for what you see and evidently for what you figure out.
Data can be singular or plural. But note the difference in phenomenon and phenomena, criterion and criteria, memorandum and memoranda, referendum and referenda, and medium and media.
Media may be singular or plural depending on the construction.
A resolution is adopted, not passed.
Don't use jurist as a synonym for judge. A jurist is a person knowledgeable in the law.
Not all lawmakers are solons. A solon is a wise person.
Use v. in citing legal cases, not vs.: Sullivan v. The New York Times.
Surgery is the art of operating. Doctors don't perform surgery, but they may perform surgical procedures.
Compared to is to liken. Compared with is to bring out points of resemblance or difference, such as the poetry of Keats compared with the poetry of Shelley.
Idiomatically, sense meaning logic or sensibleness is followed by in. However, if the sense signifies meaning it is followed by of. Can you get the sense of that poem?
Parameter doesn't mean boundaries of. Parameter and perimeter are different words. Appraise and apprise are different words. So are maze and maize.
The word you want is discreet to describe prudence and the ability to hold a confidence. Discrete means individual, distinct.
Cows, chickens, goats, horses, cain, hell and prices are raised; people are reared.
Continual means recurring at brief intervals but never stopping. Continuous means to occur without interruption. Continual best applies to time. Continuous best applies to movement.
Sensuous implies delight in beauty of color, sound, texture or artistic form. Sensual stresses indulgence of appetite, especially sexual appetite. Sensuous is not a synonym for sexy.
Masterful implies strength of personality: a masterful conductor. Masterly shows masterful ability: a masterly job, a masterly performance.
Ingenious (in-jeen-yus) comes from ingenuity and means clever, shrewd, inventive. Ingenuous (in-jen-you-us) means artless, innocent, without sophistication and open, frank, candid. Ingenue is an artless girl, or an actress playing such a role.
Not all real estate dealers are Realtors. A Realtor belongs to the real estate board.
It is jew's-harp, jews'-harp, Jew's-harp, Jews'-harp, jew's harp, jews' harp, Jew's harp, Jews' harp, but not juice harp.
Slight Differences
Some words have essentially the same meanings, but you may want to choose one over another in certain situations.
Farther is better for distances and further is better for degree, quantity.
Founder is to be at rock bottom. Flounder could imply a flopping around.
Ensure implies making certain and inevitable. Don't use insure for that. Assure implies a making sure in the mind by removing all doubt. Secure implies action taken to guard against loss.
Sexism, Racism and Prejudiced Writing
Be alert to possible discrimination in writing. Most of us are not going to make conscious decisions that might be called sexist, racist, etc. But differences can occur in the way we write about people, and words that are discriminatory can creep into writing.
Here are some examples of that kind of writing:
1. The deaf accountant spotted the error.
2. John Johnson and Kathy Mata were recently promoted. Johnson has been with the company for five years and Kathy for seven.
3. Marianne Jones, an African-American teacher, was chosen the outstanding member of the faculty for the 1997-98 school year. She teaches mathematics.
The basic rule in avoiding sexism, racism and ageism is this: Don't treat people differently because of race, sex, age, handicaps, etc. Don't call women girls or ladies. Don't use clichés like ripe old age. Don't be surprised because someone accomplishes something even though he or she is handicapped. Don't make derogatory remarks about people who are not like us.
Don’t use age – either young or older – if it isn’t pertinent.
Athletes Who Say They'll Go Somewhere to School
Athletes who tell coaches that they will go to such and such a school simply have announced their intentions. They've said they will attend TCU, or wherever. Such an announcement is not a firm commitment, and it's definitely not a verbal commitment, which is a redundancy.
All they've said is that they will sign with this particular school on the signing date. Until then, they can change the
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