KRISTINA'S POETRY PAGE
These poems that I have written have never before been published or shown to the public. They reflect a three year span during which I wrote and experimented with using language to create depth of feeling. I am looking for honest in-depth criticism and comment that will help me to improve my technique as a writer. Please feel free to email me at the address below with any comments and questions you may have. Thank you.
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BROKEN
I'm Broken.
Can't you tell?
Maybe it's not easy to see
Hidden behind Bobbi Brown Lipstick
Stila Blush
Chanel Powder
Blonde highlights every six weeks
Ralph Lauren shirt
DKNY pants
Coach purse
Daddy, look I'm PERFECT
You just don't understand
Once you break
Your just not the same
The pieces don't fit as nicely as they use to
Daughter, you'll be fine
Just get a good job, nice car, Roth IRA
That Ph.D. is all you need to achieve happiness
Cross your legs, don't swear, use the correct fork
When eating ten dollar Riddichio, Goat Cheese salad
Pain is like dirt, easily washed away after a storm
I'm Broken
Can't you tell?
Don't wait for a Prince on a white Stallion
He won't be around to save me
Maybe you should keep those hands to yourself, Doctor
I'm only twelve
I trust very little
Maybe even less than a little
Liar, deceit, empty promises
What do you mean I'm too emotional?
What do you mean I'm not PERFECT enough?
I'm Broken
Can't you tell?
Please don't be ashamed
Please don't try to understand
I have traveled such a long time
I have come all this way to escape
Be gentle when taking my hand
The journey has been rough
The spirit is fragile
I'm Broken
Can't you tell?
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VALLEY OF THE SUN
They come captivated
Stumbling, drooling, searching
Wild animals desperate, hungry, vile
Midas and his touch of GOLD
A tired, hazy, lackadaisical sun
Filtering it's light upon an endless scorched valley
Days that turn into night
Night that ceases to exist
Hours become meaningless
Time becomes extinct
Chips, wires and plastic
Molded and twisted together
They never cease to consume
Swallowing life after life
The soft hum whispering from a square box
Concealed in a corner lulling you to sleep
Echoing promises of riches to be won
Humming melodiously to the beating of your heart
It creates raptures of joy
Saliva to drip
When purchasing that new flashy car
All leather interior, 30 CD disc changer,
12 horse power engine
Lush, manicured lawns withering like the desert
Burning like molten lava,
Down your scorched, blistering torn back
It comes with a price this euphoria
LOVE does not grow on trees
Happiness is not found in a cracker jack box
The Valley of The Sun
Quietly it's bubble wrapped and sent priority
Stock Options, 401K
Skinny, non-fat Cappachino
Hoisen, Mustard Seed Trout on a bed of greens
Whose throat did you slit to live in the dream valley?
Picture perfect Utopia
Here comes another Mr. Jones
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RAVAGE
One single bright flourescent bulb glowing into blackness. I can't see your face, I can only hear the sound of your rustling clothes and savior the aroma of your scent as it rushes me from behind. I land on hard, cool cement. My arms pinned behind my head. Fuck me you bastard. Fuck me hard. So hard I bleed. I want to hear your sneer as your lips curl into that cruel sadistic smile you love to show me. Spit in my face. I am your whore. Bruise my lips, bite my neck. Use me, I am your pursuer. It is not your fault. It can only be mine. This is not meant to last. This is for right now. So do it. Fuck me. Don't say you need me because it is a lie. All lies, lies, lies. It's either your kiss, or your fist in my side. I want to feel ectasy for one moment. I want to feel closer to God. You are the only one who can make this fantasy real. Rip it. Grasp it. Suck it. Come on, Fuck me. I'll let you win this wicked game. Just give me something in return for the pain. One single bright flourescent bulb glowing into blackness. Your eyes are daggers looking straight into mine. I am tranced. I can not look away. I see your soul. Can you see mine? Don't stop. What are you afraid of? Love, hate, what? Just Fuck me. No commitment. No goodbyes. No I'm sorry. Kick me. Beat me. Touch me. Hiss into my ear. Call me your slut. Tell me I'm ugly. Say you hate me. Fuck me. Come on me. But never tell me the truth. What do you want? What do you need? For just this moment let me in. Tommorow you'll be hers, but tonite be mine. I want to feel your hand roughly between my thighs on my breast. I want to feel you in me. Wet, warm, powerful. Turn me over, turn me around. I want to be close to you, in you. Fuck me. Laugh at me bitterly. Use me. Your flesh is burning me. The sweat soaks into the dust. I am on fire. Please, Don't stop. I'm almost their. One single bright flourescent bulb glowing into blackness.
I stand. You have gone. I am lost. Forever, without you.
I love you.
COPYWRITED 1999
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