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A NEW ADDICTION
By Victoria Wordham
A New Addiction: The Fad of Cutting
As a student you walk down the halls every day, staring into the eyes of over two
thousand other students. You know some of them smoke, some of them drink, and some of them even have therapists, but something else is out there that you don't see so clearly. Some of these students are cutters.
Cutting is the latest form of self-relief; the newest fad among students who have terrible secrets to hide and horrible pasts to bury. Many of these students, some of whom you would never in a million years guess were victims to this addiction, walk the halls with chins raised and smiles painted. But under their shirt sleeves and arm bands are self-mutilating scars: reminders of the horrors waiting for them elsewhere.
Cutting is an underhanded addiction. It isn't as blatant a dependence as smoking or drinking. Upon hearing the news of a cutter, one might think, 'Well, that student is a wonderful actor.' The truth is that they cover their angst and anguish well, and although hiding from the limelight of confrontation, they all want to be heard.
"I don't care what people think of me." Grade 11 Male said. "Most of my friends try to convince me to stop. Only two or three of them cut alongside me."
Another cutter, Grade 9 Female #1, said, "That's just another way of saying we want someone to care. But no one knows because no one asks."
The students cut together in groups or by themselves in their rooms. And in school, if they can't stand the pressures of the world around them, they pick at their scars just to see themselves bleed.
"I pick at my cuts so they bleed and scar," Grade 9 Female #2 said. "The blood represents my stress going away and my scars represent the pain I have gone through."
At home they don't single out any sharp object. They use anything they can get their hands on. "When I first started I wasn't serious so I used a safety pin, but now I use a pocket knife or a very sharp thumbtack I made." Grade 9 Female #2 said.
Grade 11 Male felt similarly. "I just use anything that can cut."
The students rarely feel guilty for it, because in their eyes, their actions are justified. If an adult asked, some would come out, but others would feel this would be a useless step towards resolution. The students believe wholeheartedly that the fault is not theirs, but that of their families'. If asked, the students don't go into deep detail of their home lives, and when they do, the information shared is devastating. For a world like theirs, cutting seems logical.
'Fear' is not a word or emotion associated with the addiction. Death does not worry them at all. "Death doesn't really scare me. I'd risk death just to feel better." Grade 11 Male said. And many students, such as Grade 9 Female #2, have risked death.
These students want the scars to stay. They want to look down at their arms years in the future and see a reminder of what they have lived through. It brings them a sense of accomplishment.
"If I looked at them in the future, I'd be sad and think of those past days as the good times where I could cut when I needed to," Grade 9 Female #1 said. "But I will stop, and it will hurt, but I'm willing to face the pain of letting go."
Students need someone to look to for guidance; someone to save their lives because they can't do it themselves. They don't want to be punished. They want to be helped. Look into all those eyes again as you walk down the halls tomorrow. You'll see someone you've never noticed before.
***END***
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