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THE ENTREPRENEUR
From Sullivan's Short Stories
By Laura Santeler
I have been looking for another job. Well, actually I have been sitting on my ass waiting for the perfect job to come to me. And guess what--it did! A few weeks ago I was reading an article in People Magazine. Rich parents are hiring " experts" to do things like ,Teach your kid to ride a bike, potty train your kid, bake with your kid, and one expert even takes your daughter shopping for clothes so you don't have to be stressed out
Ok, so here is my new job. I am hiring my self out as an expert bitch/ nag. Here are the services I will be offering. for only $100.00 an hour ( this is what the experts charge) I will come to your house and nag your children to 1. clean their room, feed the dog, do the dishes, etc... for only $50.00 more I will dole out consequences for not listening. For only$10.00 more I will add in my expert "making the kid feel really bad and guilty speech".
Or you can hire me for the all inclusive plan that includes the above, plus, I will call your kid continually on their cell phone, know exactly where they are at every moment, know who they are with and what they are doing. I will also make sure they never fall below a C in any given class and are attending school ( all classes on a daily basis). People can get all this for only $200.00 an hour. I have excellent references who can attest to my expertise in these skills.
I have had 18 years of experience and specialize in being really mean, making kids spill their guts and tell all, scaring kids by PMSing and getting really bi polar thereby freaking them out so bad they will do said task for fear of being killed.
So what do you guys think? I can see the $$$$ rolling in now. Good by old job, hello entrepreneurship.
After the business really takes off, I will do your husband. I mean nagging, all of you with dirty minds.
**End**
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