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Welcome to the Jungle II
(ENGLISH)
HOW THE LION BENEFITS FROM THE LITTLE ANIMALS' POVERTY
One day all the little animals went up to the King of the Jungle and complained about their poverty, and in particular about the fact that every time, during the dry season, they had to travel long distances to drink the precious fluid, and demanded a WATER WELL be built for them... They cited how the resources that they contributed to the kingdom were wasted in WARS and EXTRAVAGANT PROJECTS to the tastes of the King... He, however, replied with all kinds of excuses: the lack of resources, that it wasn't a matter of him not wanting it, but that it was a matter of "priorities" --which was one of his favorite words...
Meanwhile, an Owl --who had very good eyes-- had been observing life in the jungle, and thought this way: "Every time there's a dry season the little animals must come to the little dirty waterhole where the Lion waits for them... Had they been well fed and strong, he would have had to run after them and even risk resistance. And, more importantly, the little animals are forced to fight the Lion's wars as the quick way out of poverty..."
And that's how the Owl landed an important --and well paid-- post in the brand new Astronomy Department created by the King of the Jungle --to the effect of exploring life in other planets...
NOTE: THE LITTLE PEOPLE NEED THEIR OWN WELL (COOPERATIVES, UNIONS, CREDIT UNIONS*, SELF-EMPLOYMENT), BUT NO ONE WILL BUILD IT FOR THEM, BUT THEMSELVES...
*"Thanks largely to a credit union, the Caja Laboral Popular (CLP), the Mondragon co-operatives have been able to develop from a standing start in the 1950s to the point where they now provide jobs for some 60,000 workers." (http://www.australia.coop/rm_fana_2002.htm)
EVOLVE OR...
Once upon a time lived a race of dinosaurs whose violence and appetite alarmed everybody... One day a Little Ant, tired of feeling stepped upon, and worried about her cooperative enterprise, came up to the Americanus Raptor --the biggest dinosaur of them all-- and asked: "Why you eat and eat everything in your path? Why don't you slim down? Why can't we little animals at least have our own way? You can't deny evolution, you know." Then the dinosaur, blowing the Little Ant away, shouted: "Bigger is better, so get lost!"
And it is said that the Little Ant, later, gathered the whole cooperative and said: "Comrades, our world is being threatened by the dinosaurs, so..." And at that precise moment the Earth was hit by a big ball of fire, destroying all but the small animals...
Moral: "It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change." -Charles Darwin
DEEP QUESTION: Why God could have thrown the asteroid if it weren't for the disnosaurs' arrogant behavior and mighty appetite?
*See link "SUPERSIZE IT"*
HOW GOD WAS TEMPTED
One day the Devil, having heard about that incredible story of turning the other cheek, slapped God in order to make him fall into temptation... And He, without hesitation, turned the other cheek... Another day, escalating the provocations, the Devil pitched Him a brick, but God only smiled... Until, tired of wasting his time, the Devil had an idea: He would dress like another god...
And that's how God, who wouldn't tolerate other gods, became so mad that He declared war against the Devil...
HOW THE VULTURES BENEFIT FROM ORGANIZING THE LITTLE ANIMALS
One day the Vultures, who depended on the lion's leftovers, got together to organize the little animals... One of the birds started saying: "We should organize the Sheep to worship a poor Shepherd, who, because he tried to save them, was crucified; but who left the promise of the obedient sheep going to Paradise, in which the lion will be tamed..." Then another bird added: "Very sweet. Likewise, we'll organize them to denounce the abuses against the poor little animals in 'other' jungles..."
Meanwhile, an Owl who had been observing the problems of the jungle, and who had been invited by mistake, spoke this way: "The lion was able to kill the poor Shepherd because the sheep did nothing. Why not do something to resist the lion?"
And that's why the Vultures warned the little animals of the jungle against the 'subversive owls'...
THE PARROT THAT KNEW HOW TO ROAR
Once upon a time, in the deep jungle, there was a Parrot whose capacity to mimic others impressed everybody. One day, observing that all the little animals panicked when the King of the Jungle roared, and fearing for his own life, he learned to roar himself... It occurred to him that he could form an alliance with the Lion and partake of his feasts, and even, why not, be revered like a king...
One time, however, the Lion --who happened to be running out of little animals to hunt and was mighty hungry-- noticed the Parrot, and roared: "You are exactly what you I'm looking for!" and gulped him down amid the bird's cries of, "I'm a lion too!"
THE PIGS' REVOLUTION
(Characters in this story: lion #1, the USA; lion #2, the former USSR; and #3, the EU and others. The Little and the Big Pigs are always the same... The action takes place in Cuba.)
(This story shouldn't be taken too literally. However, it has its moral...)
Once upon a time there were some little pigs who decided to carry out a revolution and established a utopia called "socialism," in which everything was supposed to be shared equally. And, of course, soon enough they were attacked by some lions. Then it turned out that the Big Pigs (by now some of the pigs got big and fat) allied themselves with some other lions. They petted them and told the Little Pigs (these remained little due to lack of freedom and food) that these lions were indeed peace-loving creatures. And they even sent the Little Pigs into wars in order to free the other farms from the old lions and secure them for the newer ones. Down the road, these lions decided that the pigs ate too much and banded together with their former competitors, who only fed on juicy prey. The Big Pigs now chose the only lions left. They felt that they could hang on to power and keep living high on the hog if they struck a deal with the new lions: The Big Pigs get to feed their power appetite; the new lions get to fill their piggy banks thanks to cheap labor, and get to enjoy lions-only tourist attractions. The Little Pigs, in the meantime, receive promises: The Big Pigs tell them that if the put up with the new lions, they'll be safe from the old ones; the new lions tell them that if they work hard enough, they'll soon have plenty; and the old lions tell them that if they rebel, they'll get to live in a brand new pigsty called "democracy," just like before. And they lived happily ever after...
"If you make people think they're thinking, they'll love you; But if you really make them think, they'll hate you."
-- Don Marquis
HOW THE BLACK SHEEP WERE EXPELLED
One day the Lion, who had been thinking how to best eat the sheep, decided to dress as one of them... This way the common sheep trusted the new sheep more and more every day, some confessing to him, others voting for him, and most allowing to be fleeced by him...
Meanwhile, the Black Sheep --who was able to see through camouflage-- thought this way: "If he lies, and takes the lion's share, lion he is..."
And that's the reason why from then on the Black Sheep weren't allowed to mingle anymore with the simple and common sheep...
"What makes a lion a lion?" See http://webspawner.com/users/donquijote70
(SPANISH)
COMO SE BENEFICIA EL LEON DE LA POBREZA DE LOS ANIMALITOS
Un dia todos los pequenos animales fueron ante el Rey de la Selva y protestaron de su pobreza, y en particular del hecho de que cada vez, durante la temporada de seca, ellos tenian que viajar largas distancias para beber el precioso liquido, y demandaron que se les construyera un POZO DE AGUA... Ellos citaron como los recursos que ellos contribuian al reino eran malgastados en GUERRAS y PROYECTOS ESTRAFALARIOS para satisfacer al Rey... El, sin embargo, les respondio con toda clase de excusas: la falta de recursos, que no era que el no quisiera, sino que era un problema de "prioridades" --que era una de sus palabras favoritas...
Mientrastanto, el Buho --que tenia muy buenos ojos-- habia estado observando la vida en la jungla, y penso asi: "Cada vez que hay una temporada de seca los animalitos tienen que venir a este charco sucio donde el Leon los espera... Si hubiesen estado bien alimentados y fuertes, el hubiera tenido que correr tras ellos e incluso arriesgarse a que se le resistieran. Y, lo que es mas importante, los pequenos animales se ven forzados a pelear las guerras del Leon como la salida rapida de la pobreza..."
Y asi fue como el Buho consiguio un importante --y bien pagado-- puesto en el nuevo Departamento de Astronomia creado por el Rey de la Selva --con el fin de explorar la vida en otros planetas...
NOTA: LA GENTE PEQUENA NECESITA SU PROPIO POZO DE AGUA (COOPERATIVAS, SINDICATOS, BANCOS COOPERATIVOS, AUTO EMPLEO), PERO NADIE SE LOS VA A CONSTRUIR, SINO ELLA MISMA...
EVOLUCIONA O...
Erase una vez vivian una raza de dinosaurios cuya violencia y apetito voraz alarmaban a todo el mundo... Un dia la Pequena Hormiga, cansada de sentirse pisada, y preocupada por su empresa cooperativa, fue ante el Americanus Raptor --el mas grade dinosaurio de todos-- y le pregunto: "Por que comes y comes todo a tu paso? Por que no bajas de peso? No puedes negar la evolucion, tu sabes." Entonces el dinosaurio, resoplandole a la hormiguita, le grito: "Grande es mejor, asi que pierdete!"
Y se dice que la Pequena Hormiga, despues, reunio a toda la cooperativa y dijo: "Camaradas, nuestro mundo esta siendo amenazado por los dinosaurios, asi que..." Y en ese preciso momento la Tierra fue sacudida por una gran bola de fuego, destruyendo a todos menos a los pequenos animales...
Moraleja: "No son los mas fuertes los que sobreviven, ni los mas inteligentes, sino los mas dispuestos al cambio." -Charles Darwin
COMO LOS BUITRES SE BENEFICIAN DE ORGANIZAR A LOS ANIMALITOS
Un dia los Buitres, que dependian de las sobras del leon, se reunieron para organizar a los animalitos... Uno de los pajaros comenzo diciendo: "Debemos organizar a los Corderos para que adoren a un pobre Pastor, que, por tratar de salvarlos, fue crucificado; pero que dejo la promesa de que los corderos obedientes irian al Paraiso, donde el leon sera domesticado..." Entonces otro pajaro anadio: "Muy sentimental. Asimismo, los organizaremos para denunciar los abusos que sufren los pobres animalitos en 'otras' junglas..."
Mientrastanto, un Buho que habia estado observando los problemas de la selva, y que habia sido invitado por error, hablo asi: "Si el leon pudo matar al pobre Pastor es porque los corderos no hicieron nada. Por que no hacer algo para resistir al leon?"
Y este es el por que los Buitres advirtieron a los animalitos de la jungla contra los 'buhos subversivos'...
LA REVOLUCION DE LOS CERDITOS
(Esta historia infantil no debe ser tomada demasiado literalmente. Sin embargo, si tiene su moraleja...)
Erase una vez unos cerditos que dicidieron hacer una revolucion y establecieron una utopia llamada "socialismo", en la que se suponia que todo debia repartirse equitativamente. Y, por supuesto, prontamente fueron atacados por unos leones. Entonces resulto que los Grandes Cerdos (para este entonces algunos de los cerditos se hicieron grandes y gordos) se aliaron a otros leones. Ellos los acariciaron y le dijeron a los Cerditos (estos permanecieron pequenos debido a la falta de libertad y comida) que estos leones si eran amantes de la paz. E incluso mandaron a los Cerditos a diferentes guerras para liberar a otras granjas de los viejos leones y asegurarlas para los ultimos. Andando el tiempo, estos leones pensaron que los cerdos comian mucho y se unieron a sus antiguos competidores, que solo se alimentaban de presas jugosas. Ahora los Grandes Cerdos escogieron a los unicos leones disponibles. Ellos pensaron que podrian sobrevivir y mantenerse viviendo la gran vida si llegaban a un acuerdo con los nuevos leones: Los Grandes Cerdos consiguen saciar su apetito de poder; los nuevos leones consiguen llenar sus alcancias gracias a la mano de obra barata, y consiguen disfrutar de areas turisticas solo para leones. Los Cerditos reciben promesas: Los Grandes Cerdos les dicen que si soportan a los nuevos leones, estaran a salvo de los viejos; los nuevos leones les dicen que si trabajan lo suficientemente duro, pronto nadaran en la abundancia; y los viejos leones les dicen que si rebelan, conseguiran vivir en un nuevo chiquero llamado "democracia", exactamente igual que antes. Y para siempre fueron felices...
COMO DIOS SE DEJO TENTAR
Un dia el Diablo, habiendo escuchado de aquella increible doctrina de dar la otra mejilla, y decidido a tentarlo, le dio un bofetada a Dios... Y este, efectivamente, ofrecio la otra mejilla... Otro dia, escalando las provocaciones, le tiro un ladrillo, pero Dios solo sonrio... Hasta que, ya cansado, al Diablo se le ocurrio una idea: se vestiria como otro dios...
Y asi fue como Dios, que no toleraba otros dioses, se puso tan furioso que declaro la guerra al Diablo...
COMO LAS OVEJAS NEGRAS FUERON EXPULSADAS
Un dia el Leon, que habia estado pensando como mejor comerse a las pobres ovejas, decidio vestirse como una de ellas... Asi las ovejas comunes fueron confiando mas y mas cada dia en la nueva oveja, llegando unas a confesarse con ella, otras a votar por ella, y las mas a dejarse pelar...
Mientrastanto, la Oveja Negra --que podia ver a traves del camuflaje-- penso asi: "Si miente, y se lleva la parte leonina, leon es..."
Y esta es la razon por la cual en lo adelante las Ovejas Negras no fueron admitidas nunca mas con las ovejitas comunes y corrientes...
funny interview
SUPERSIZE IT
some funny political quotes
Hypocrisy Today
The Garden of Eden
HOMEPAGE
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