EXTRAORDINARY WEEK!

NOT MUCH HAPPENS

In a series of remarkable developments, not much happened this week. The Divine One has found a house she likes; our Musical Mistress is well set up in her new house at Marion; Michael and Sarah came to their senses and ate at the Royal Tandoori on Sunday night and the Grand Kleagle enjoyed the party he went to on Saturday night.
There was a bashing and a stabbing at one suburban high school, but as we said, nothing unusual happened.
Port Power enjoyed a good victory over Geelong but lost star player Brendan Layde.

NO CHANGES TO POLICY

BOYS WILL KEEP DRINKING

In a totally expected and unsurprising announceent tonight, the Kleagle reasserted his determination to keep drinking at the Crown and Anchor Hotel, from 8:30 every Thursday.

STUDENT DOES PART FOR CHARITY

RAISES $49.50 BY FELLATIO

This young student last Saturday raised $49.50 for the "Keep a Pimp Comfy" Fund. KAPCF would like to thank the ninety nine sailors who gave so generously.

No need to ask which school this plucky pre-teen attends!